What a day....

Wow.... as I sit reflecting on the previous events of this day I am in awe.... From the beginning to the end........

       Carm, Mr. Kent and myself decided to go on a beautiful car ride this morning around 10, which was originally planned for 9, but you will see how amazingly Gods timing was orchestrated. We went to a place that i'd never been called Squaw Rock; a beautiful nature filled metro-park in Chagrin Ohio. After parking the car, Mr. Kent told Carm and I that the bike path we would be riding would bring us back to our starting point.... we were excited. So we begin to ride, excited and thrilled about the adventure and quality time we'd have... but this thrill quickly diminished as we found ourselves facing giant hills which felt like 23 feet high, but were in reality 2 or 3 feet; they were gradual. At one point, Carms asthma began to flare and we had to take a rest period.

      After a few minutes in the shade, we jumped on our bikes to face the treacherous journey before us (spoken by a truly out of shape woman). 30 minutes turned into 50 minutes, which turned into the realization that the path we were on was not leading us back to the starting point. So we stop to ask a man who too was on the path walking his dog. He shares with us that we are not only miles past our starting point but we are also in an entirely different city... WHATTTTTTTTTT! YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME? Then I asked to use his phone to call my uncle and he passively said no without actually speaking the words. 

     My desire at this point was to turn around and head towards the rough hills in defeat, but Carm, seeing the beautiful downhill land thought it would be nice to coast down.... so we did and it was fun, but while going down, I looked ahead and saw the beginning and the end of a major car crash. So we rushed to the edge of the road, Carm had confirmed that the victim was bleeding and the rest was fully God. I jumped off my bike, while running towards the hurt man, I asked him if i could call 911, I did, while simultaneously asking for his symptom--- Sir, did you blackout, wheres the pain, can I assess your wound, are your dizzy, how is your vision, where did you hit your head.... 

    About 4-5 minutes later, a white truck pulls over, hands us paper towels to clean the man off. They leave and though my desire would be to clean off this entire mans body, I begin to apply pressure to his wound. He takes his shirt off and allows me to place it on his head, he holds down. Within a few minutes another white jeep pulls over, a woman jumps off and says that she's a nurse... I run off the details.... I too am a nurse.. he has a hematoma on the left side of his head, bleeding has slowed, pressure applied, do you have any water that I can place a wet rag on his wound? She gets the water. Another man from an illuminating company comes and asks if we need anything... the nurse Shelly asks for gloves and gauze and as soon as I put them on to prepare to wrap his head, I hear the ambulance coming. So i place everything aside and ask the man if I could pray with him. His name was Mark, age 61.

     As Shelly and I stepped back and allowed the fire department and ambulance to now care for Mark we began to talk and I share with her how it was God that brought us down the hill. How it was all orchestrated. Then she tells me that she usually doesn't come that route, but as she was listening to Tim McGraws 'Live like you're dying song' she decided to go another way. She too came to the realization that it was all God's plan. We laughed and talked about God's perfect timing....

     What a day :) A perfectly orchestrated day!

As I reflect on all the details, I am reminded of my past 3 weeks of working at the camp as a nurse. God didn't call me to work there because I was equipped, because in my eyes I wasn't... but God equipped me every single day on the job to be led by His Holy Spirit. I saw that manifest today as I asked Mark, the victim in the crash today, all the questions needed to pinpoint any underlying issues. I've never sat down and studied a script on what to ask/what not to ask... but through great teaching and the presence of Gods Holy Spirit.... He equipped me! The Hands and Feet of Christ :)

Great is Thy Faithfulness...

As i've been sitting on my living room couch making ringtones for my phone, I came across an old song that I use to love. I hadn't heard the song in years... maybe 2 or 3. But this song was one that I can remember countless times, and through countless hardships, God meeting me from the place of His faithfulness...
And now years later, as soon as the song begins my Spirit man jumps to the wall of my chest, stands beside my heart and says to listen and give thanks :) So I put everything away, turned the running water off and did everything else on my mental list so that I could enter into the presence of God without a divided attention!
I sat.... listened.... Cried... and praised God with a heart beating with thankfulness. My God has been so good to me. From then to now He has:

• Delivered me from Sin
• Allowed me to progress to yrs in my calling as a nurse
• Brought people in an out of my life
• Renewed my mind--- and is continuing to
• Taken me to a new place of fellowship
• Shielded my eyes from sin
• Revealed to me the tactics of the enemy
• Allowed me to witness His hand of Love in my family's life
• Shown me His Power and Authority

Though there is so much more, I want to expound on the last point. This past week, as the Lord allowed me to minister alongside my brothers and sisters in Mexico, He gave us the grace and gift of seeing His powerful hand in action within the hearts of 622 people. My mind can't comprehend it, but even now i'm writing in the Spirit, because there's no logical understanding to belief in God's supernatural workings :) I'm in Awe. He set me, us, His children free so that we might witness Him in action. 

We are the modern day version of the Israelites when they left Egypt. They saw the enemy chasing them from behind, but when they turned around, God's faithfulness... His strong and mighty hands, had Supernaturally made a pathway for them to walk through..... 2 years ago I had no idea of how faithful God was and now.... it still amazes me that I only know the half  of it:) Great is Thy Faithfulness!

Day 1: Distractions

As I sit here before the Lord.... before the world. before the noise I am brought to the understanding that there are so many distractions that try to take my attention. For instance, the trash truck has spent the last 15 minutes or so (at least that's how it feels) going down my street. Making a noise that's seems so much louder when i'm trying to stop and dwell in the presence of God.

Then there's that over bloated mind that won't stop thinking. Thinking about what?

• The iPhone I will be purchasing today for $75. Such a wonderful deal but also a finance thief
• Called State Farm and had to move my automatic deduction date till the end of May. The 30th to be exact. They said they will have to just place the account on suspension until its paid. My what a weighty word.
• The scholarship foundation that I was with are no longer doing scholarships... so funding for academia is now strained
• Thinking of how to pay back my Best Friend her $69 from my next check... when I don't even know how much will be in there?
• Paying a monthly phone bill of $55 now instead of the $20 that I paid sometimes
• Car insurance $39, Phone bill $55, Gas..... Life

That little thing called life is starting to happen and I am starting to need that extra cup of trust. Father, please help me to make good, wise decisions. I'm not asking for handouts, but what I need more than ever is just to be in your presence..... All these things I have listed are my distractions :) From my brain to this blog, may I now focus on the giver of All things :) I love you. I need you. I want you Jesus! Here I am to worship!

Sincerely,

The Cares of this world won't stop me :)


Today's Reading:
Acts 10---- Peter called to go to the house of Cornelius

• Peter is staying at the house of Simon the Tanner
• He receives a vision of a sheet of all different kids of 4-footed animals and is told of the Lord to eat (For he'd fallen asleep or into a trance hungry)
• Peter refused to eat a total of 3 times (Interesting correlation with the number 3)
• Cornelius, a devout God fearing man receives a vision to send for Peter. Sends 2 men
• Peter leave with the two men and return to Cornelius's house 
• Cornelius reveals to Peter His vision
• Peter shares the gospel with Cornelius and his household and they receive the Holy Spirit.
• They begin to speak in tongues and are baptized in Jesus Name

Praise God :) 

Now Lord, what does this mean? Are you saying that this is the way of Salvation? Or did you allow the gentiles to speak in tongues that the Jewish people might know that you are able to save the gentiles in the same way you saved the Jews? Lastly Lord, are you able to save in other ways? Through other gifts?

" Stand up, for I am only a man like you" ~ Acts 10:26

 

Hmmm.... Sin

Sin. Pecado. Lawlessness.... Father why must we struggle with such a horrible inheritance? Why can't we ever get it right? Why do I disappoint you so often? And myself? I'm not quite sure the answer to any of these questions... so once again I must rely on your Grace!

    But there is this one sin that haunts me. A sin of the past and present that continues to tempt me. Overtake me. Overcome. So often I have prayed that you would deliver me. Set me free. But it seems as though this one is written in my DNA. I've tried rebuking the tempter, speaking scripture, pleading with you... but my mind won't rest. Father, as you have extended Grace to me all of my life, will you please continue to.... but also share with me what I must do to rebuke satan? So often i feel like a victor of the chains You break off of me, but then others I feel so much bondage.

   Regardless of how I feel, I thank you for your unfailing love. That's all i have ever been able to lean upon. So once again, I will rest with a heart that is repentant, yet urging and expectant of the work your hands will do!

Savior.. Please :) I can't keep moving forward. This is the thorn in my side.

Sincerely,
Ancestor of Paul

Doctrinal eyes vs Incarnational eyes....

Overpowering passion.....

Wow.... what a day. 5:37 pm Eastern standard time and I sit here feeling as though my heart has just been calibrated? Charged? Super open.... So many things that I could say but the one thing that I must reflect on is my understanding of why? God has placed a particular passion within me and I'm not quite sure what to do, say or even understand it..... So it's honestly as if I have this ball of anxious, curious, passionate yarn interweaving God and I :) And even that is a beautiful image :)

Time to break it down
        As I've been taking a Gospel and Culture class, we are reading a book called Rediscovering Christianity by Donovan (The greatest book I've ever read on missions). The author is a priest who has been called to take the Masai people in Tanzania Africa. Throughout the book He gives such great points on where we stand as the body of Christ:
1. Weak (The American culture, in itself, stands weak in the sense that we are 2 things: Individualistic and Bound by Organization)
2. Segregated (Denominationalism represent visible borders)
3.Westernized (We are a people who have the mentality of taking our Christianity to the rest of the world)
    He speaks so much about cultural salvation which entails preaching Christ and Him crucified and resurrected. Then Baptism and a Holy Life governed by the Holy Spirit. There is so much more I could share with this particular book but i want to focus on point #2.

Denominationalism
    At the age of 20, I became apart of the Pentecostal church. In fact, it was an Apostolic family that first shared with me the gift of speaking in tongues. And it just made sense that because the Lord gave me the gift of speaking in tongues the next night, that I was meant to be apart of a denomination that spoke in tongues?
   At the age of 21 the Lord gave me the great privilege of attending Mount Vernon Nazarene University, where I attend currently and over the past 3 years, I have noticed 2 main things: 1)I've noticed that a lot of other denominations are open to fellowship and even serving with other denominations and 2) I've noticed how denominantionalism serves more as a bondage--- once in always in don't talk to strangers.
    In so many ways I feel bad for even saying that, but when you have a heart of missions, as God has given me, I don't see 'Denomination?' as I don't see race or gender? Before I began here at MVNU I never thought this way, but because He pulled me out and introduced me to others, I get the opportunity to witness the wide scope of the Church.
So What is Truth?
   Truth is represented in Jesus Christ. I'm not confused of what I believe, nor am I trying to put myself in a situation that would be detrimental to my Spiritual man. Truth is this:

• There is One God who is represented in 3 persons: Father, Son and Holy Ghost
• The Bible is the infallible Word of God
• Jesus and God are One
• Salvation comes through first Believing (Faith) that Christ is the Son of God. Confessing with your mouth that He died for your sin. Repenting of your sinful nature. Baptism for the remission of sin. Submission to the Holy Ghost for the sanctification/purification of your life. 
• A person who is Saved will exemplify fruits of the Spirit
• The Spiritual Gifts represented in 1 Corinthians 12 are still manifested today and are distributed by the Spirit of God (But test each Spirit)
• Speaking in tongues is an active gift that is also used as personal worship with the person and God. ( I do not believe you must speak in tongues in order to get into heaven)
• Communion- Do this in memory of Jesus. Serves as a sign of receiving the Grace that Jesus has bestowed upon us in breaking His body and spilling His blood
• We are called to Missions- A church not partaking in Missions outside of the church is not partaking in what we have been called to be
• True Religion- Caring for the Orphan and Widow... The forgotten
• The Way- Paul, before the High Priest in Acts 9 requests to take in to prison anyone who followed "THE WAY"...

THE WAY---

    Lord please forgive me if this is out of a rebellious spirit, but now when anyone asks me what denomination I am, I say I'm not. I am a follower of THE WAY. I am a follower of Christ, known as a Christian and I don't believe in any other subcategories :) 

Traditional

    I'm over traditional anything :) Father, you know my desire, that if you ever call me into ministry, as a missionary or in whatever aspect, I don't want a title nor a church building. I want to be apart of the Church without Walls movement. Walls to me symbolize an uninvited interpretation. Walls and doors, to me represent a way of separation :) That's why I love the way Jesus appeared for the first time before His disciples post-resurrection... He didn't open the door :) He walked through it... Signifying that He is the door and nothing stops Him :) 

   Unfortunately, we the American church have forgotten the mission. We have become content... and I'm tired of the secure routine of Sunday mornings :) I want to follow the activities Christ partook in.... Deserts, Stairs, Meadows and even boats by the water were all settings Christ used when compelling men to believe in Him :) Why? Thy synagogue was there? .... Because He could reach so much more people out there.... Mind you, not everyone felt invited into the synagogue or temple? So He brought Himself to them... or they brought themselves to Him :)

Where am I going with this?

   In no way am I trying to rebel, I just want the world to receive this invitation to know Christ. To love Christ and to receive that eternal promise of life. So Lord, where do I start? Please show me how to be community focused here and now! 

I love you soooo much and I'm so thankful for how you have given me the vision to be community minded which is to respond to the mission. Please help me to not forget, nor give up on the promise you've given me. I'm not a radical, but to do your will, I believe means stepping out of the traditional setting. I won't settle for anything less. And on a special not, Father, if it is your desire for me to marry, I pray that you would please refine, clarify and refuel my brother and future husbands passion for nontraditional missions/ministry :) I know He will be the one because He too will possess this call :) And there's only a few of us! Have your way both now and always and thank you for letting me babble on :) 

Your daughter,

Nontraditional 

Give Me Jesus

Today I made a foolish decision. Today I spent close to an hour looking through countless numbers of some of my sisters in Christ pictures on instagram and facebook. I wanted to check and see how they were. To recall some of the what has become distant memories. And what began with joy and celebration with the latest and greatest news turned into sadness, tears and heartache.
     These women, whom I once sat in the same worship services with, whom I fasted with weekly, some of who I traveled the world with... we are now worlds apart. Some married. Some traveling but all still following the Lord! We all started at the same place... learning how to love God.
     But honestly, I feel like my life has... has been at a standstill. I haven't been able to do most of the things that they've done. Yet even as I write this the song 'Give Me Jesus' just came on. And that was my prayer some 5 years ago. Give me Jesus... that's all that I want. He is All that i need. So while my heart still feels heavy, Lord I say to you there is no other place I would rather be than right here in my loving presence! You are my success story :)